One of the most challenging things to do for the child of God is to truly surrender those things that grieve, stress or burden us. It’s natural for us to try to fix things and attempt to make them better. But sometimes, we’ll find ourselves in the waiting rooms of life with our hands tied. The only thing we can do is pray and wait. But even then, our prayers seem to be choked out by the load of care. My most intentional and intense prayer is, “Lord, I pray that you change my circumstances. But if You choose not to, I pray that You change me.” I first prayed this prayer during one of most difficult times in my life, thus far. I lost my mother to cancer. I ended my marriage to my drug addicted spouse. And I lost my job in the same year. All the while, I had two innocent children looking to me for everything; strength, hope, love, peace and sense of normalcy. During this time, that prayer centered me and allowed me to breathe. It gave me permission to be human and be godly at the same time. I struggled with all my might to remain hopeful that the pain of that season would soon pass. But I also made a resolve within myself to remember that God is sovereign, He can do whatever He wants to do and that in spite of the chaos I was experiencing, He loved me and that everything would work out for my good. In my humanness, I struggled within myself and was probably closer to losing my mind than I’ll ever realize. But thankfully, God strategically, positioned me in a place that allowed me to hurt, help and heal at the same time. God placed people in my life that allowed me to be vulnerable and weak without the worry of being taken advantage of or abused. He also placed people in my life that He would purpose me to help through the testimonies of my own painful experiences as I walked, and sometimes crawled through. Then God allowed me to heal through the process of my own ministry. I know for a fact, that many of us will continue to hurt and lack the peace of God because we consume ourselves with the things in our lives that we have absolutely no control over. And we never truly learn what it means to surrender our lives to God. Our misery never graduates to ministry because we can’t grab hold of the ministry. I came to understand why I had to go through that season of grief and why God brought me through. And even now, I understand why He’s sustaining me in the midst of. It was never entirely about me. God orchestrated my choices, my disappointments, my grief and my life to bring Himself glory. As I fought to stay connected to my ministry, I stayed connected to my healing. And when I fought to stay connected to my healing, I stayed connected to my Healer. Bless God! I will be the first to admit that life for me ain’t been no crystal stair. But God!!!! I DO NOT look like what I’ve been through. At center stage of my life is God, Himself. Everything we go through as children of God is for our growth and His glory. He can turn whatever you’ve been through or are going through into something that will glorify Him if your surrender it to Him.
This is my personal banner for my life: I made a mess. That mess caused me misery. I took that misery to the Master. The Master had mercy on me. Then He gave me a ministry.
How does your banner read? Don’t get stuck at the mess or the misery in . Take it to the Master and see how He positions you for ministry and your healing.
*Tressa Jo
BeyondSeeLevel
BeyondSeeLevel 