We use the term “help meet” to refer to a wife. But I believe that every woman is a help meet, not just the wife. The WOMAN was created for the MAN. Not the WIFE created for the man. She wasn’t even called wife, until after they became one. But she was called help meet when she was created (before she was even presented to Adam). I believe that the degree of our help changes based on the nature of the relationship. But as a woman, I help directly or indirectly, passively or aggressively, intentionally or unintentionally by being who and what God has called me to be in Him, 1st. The help comes by way of omission and commission. It’s what I do, that empowers/enables him in his manhood. And it’s what I don’t do that empowers/enables him in his manhood.
The woman was created for the man with purpose, not just for his pleasure. I think there will always be a severe degree of delay by women that don’t understand their influence in the lives of men (period), not just their man. She’ll never or seldom consider how her life (in the Lord) can affect the men she encounter. She’ll only reserve, the best part of her, her God nature, for the man that she wishes to call her husband. And realistically, the fact that she waits to walk in her designed help-meetness, is the reason she struggles in her own womanhood. This is why, if a man stumbles in her presence, she exonerates herself of all responsibilities. She refuses to take ownership of her part in his fall. She thinks the way she carries herself will have no effect on his life. Many times, this is why the skirts get shorter, the tops get lower and the language becomes more suggestive. She’s content with being ‘eye candy’ and has little to no urgency for being spiritual nourishment for the man. I do not believe the man in the garden or the men of today, have problems being natural/fleshly men. But they do have a problem being spiritual/holy men.
My purpose as a woman is not to stimulate his flesh (that’s automatic; it’s in his nature). But my purpose is to motivate/inspire his spirit towards righteousness. Yes. I know men are visual. But there’s a difference between being simulated and being motivated. If a man likes what he sees, he should be willing to stand up and be the man God has called him to be and go after her. I believe that the woman should be the kind of woman that makes a man want to stand up; not just lay down.
But here’s one major problem, women keep stepping outside of their purpose to be with men that aren’t stepping into theirs. I think that feminine stimulation is enough to motivate a man to stand up if he wants access to the woman. But there’s also another problem: men no longer have to stand up in their God given purpose to gain access to the woman; more specifically, the woman of God. The spiritual priority for the woman of God to encourage the man to rise to the occasion in righteousness and holy living has become almost obsolete. But her mission has become simply to get a rise out of his nature. She qualifies herself by being able to draw him in the flesh. She makes sure her body, hair, makeup and clothes are right. But many times, her spirit isn’t right or ready to be a help meet on a covenant level.
Many women of God are choosing to date outside the faith. Notice that I didn’t say “outside the church”. There are plenty of faithless men in church. They’re committed to the church but not to Christ. They’re carnal minded men still in bondage to their flesh. Women are ok with not having godly men as long as they can find good men. And even more are stepping outside their purpose and living in unrighteousness, just to have a man or some male companionship or attention at the least. She’s tired of waiting. She’s tired of being alone. She’s tired of burning in passion. The feminine influence endowed to the woman by God, Himself, has now been minimized and demoted to being physical stimuli for the man. Make sure you look good and smell good to him. Feed his flesh. (Even if you starve his soul). For him, because the ability to feed his soul isn’t even at the top of his list of qualifications for the woman he wants, it’s no longer at the top of our list either. And for many men, feeding his flesh is enough. Basically, feed his flesh and don’t get on his nerves while doing it — seems to be the mentality of many men wanting women (and not necessarily to make them wives).
But the woman, who embraces a man, but not the responsibility of helping him grow in God, has abandoned her purpose in his life. Likewise, the man that embraces a woman, but fails to lead her in the ways of righteousness, has abandoned his purpose in her life. They become spiritual leaches off one another. They fulfill each other’s flesh, but starve one another spiritually. The call each other their “soul mate”. But his/her soul was never a priority in the relationship. Becoming the help meet God has called the woman to be in a man’s life (not just her man), requires her to first be more intentional in pursuing who and what God has purposed her to be in life as a woman of God, before she pursues being who and what she wants to be for a man as a wife. You’re able to help before you’re positioned to help. You should have the heart and mindset of a wife before you become one. And you become that by being who you’re supposed to be in God.
*Tressa Jo
BeyondSeeLevel 